Chris and Rosie Ramsey: No parent knows what they’re doing – we’re all just muddling through

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Kelly Rissman

US News Reporter

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It must be fun to have Chris and Rosie Ramsey as your parents.

The double act – known for their immensely successful podcast and theatre tour, Sh*gged, Married, Annoyed, as well as Chris’ stand-up comedy and their stints on Strictly Come Dancing – always seem a bundle of fun.

They’re exactly as you’d expect, talking over Zoom from their studio (“the only place that’s tidy”) in their home near South Shields, sharing jokes, stories and banter. But really, they seem a bit relieved to escape the chaos.

As is the case for many parents, juggling their two children – Robin, eight, and Rafe, three – with everything else in life is a challenge, and one they’re happy to shut the door on for half an hour while we chat.

Continuing the working together theme (the duo also hosted The Chris & Rosie Ramsey Show, which ran for two seasons on the BBC), the husband and wife team, both 38, have now written a children’s book, There’s A Poonami In My House.

“It’s something absolutely everyone with kids can relate to,” says Chris. “It’s their main subject of conversation and humour. We went for something the kids would like, and that adults will enjoy reading,” he continues, noting it’s not too long, as he’s been known to skip pages when reading to his boys at bedtime.

Rosie laughs when I ask if there was a specific poonami that inspired the book. “There have been a lot,” she says. “Robin – our eldest – was a lot worse than Rafe. Rafe is a bit of a picky eater. Robin stuffed his face – his nappies used to be ginormous!”

“God, yeah,” Chris chimes in. “And it would be the middle of the night or just as you were leaving the house. I’ll never forget one time, I was like, ‘Oh, he’s had a poo’ – and hats off to whatever nappy brand we were using at the time – but I took his nappy off, and it was like he was wearing another nappy, but just made of s**t. I had to literally pick him up, plonk him in the bath and spray him down.”

It’s the reason, Rosie says, she’s “absolutely positive” she doesn’t want any more children. “I can’t do that again. I would have absolutely loved a girl, but we’re just sticking with the two. I think we’re happy with our lot…” she says, sounding somewhat unsure.

“Yeah, we are,” Chris adds, very definitely, eyes bulging. “Where the hell’s this going?! We’d get another boy – it’d be horrific!”

He goes on to list additional issues, like having to drive a people carrier, and reminding Rosie she had to hide her crisps as a child with two siblings.

The down-to-earth couple, who cheerfully talk all over each, agree you have to laugh your way through the tough stuff.

“You have to, because in the moment, you get so frustrated. But then when you look back at it later, you can have a little giggle,” says Rosie.

“I’ve just remembered,” adds Chris, looking at Rosie, “we haven’t even spoken about this – but Robin was kicking off about something, Rafe wasn’t that bothered, and me and you were having a bit of a bite at each other as well. And out of nowhere, Rafe went, ‘Everyone just calm down’. Out of nowhere, he went, ‘Can we all just calm down’ – and we all died laughing.”

“Oh, he did!” Rosie responds, laughing.

When I suggest they might have bred a genius, as Rafe is only three-years-old, Rosie cringes slightly and admits: “I think that’s what I say all the time. Our boys are very intense. They’re very ‘boy’ boys. They jump, they fight with each other, they climb, they’re just typical boys. And I spend my entire life going, ‘Right, calm down. Just calm down’ to everything.”

Despite the dramas, it’s clear the Ramseys love their boys – contrary to some of the backlash they’ve received recently about ‘slagging their kids off’ on their podcast. But parenting is hard. And the boys are at really different life stages.

“We call it the trenches,” says Rosie. “So, we’ve got an eight-year-old who is quite self-sufficient. He has a little bit of a huff now and again, but on the whole, he’s really good. And then we’ve got a three-year-old.

“We’re trying to get rid of the dummy at the minute and [Rafe] still wears nappies for bed. Whereas the eight-year-old wants a phone, because all of his friends have got phones. And I’m like, ‘Absolutely not’. It’s tricky, isn’t it?”

Juggling work and parenting is also hard, Chris says, describing how the grandparents arrived this morning to help with the kids, then the two of them rushed off to get ready and start work. “It’s relentless, isn’t it? It’s absolutely relentless.”

Rosie is clearly in charge when it comes to the boys. When I ask who the best parent is, she puts her hand up and Chris points to her. “I’m the organiser and the rule-maker, and you’re the fun,” she says, looking at her husband.

“Sometimes I am the oldest child,” Chris agrees, adding that he parents however Rosie tells him to.

“You’re really fun and the boys love that,” Rosie adds. “You play with them so much. Whereas I’ll make sure their teeth are brushed and they’ve got clothes. Chris will get up on a Saturday and be like, ‘Right, we’re going swimming’. I’m not great at that, so we’ve got different roles.

“I parent how my parents parented me,” she continues. “It’s a bit old. I tried gentle parenting, I really did, but it didn’t work with our kids. They need a little bit of discipline, but I think we’ve got a good balance.

“We’re really big on manners, we’re really big on respect. And sometimes, they might not give it to us – but actually, in situations when we’re not there, all we get is really good feedback, and that’s all I ever want. When they come home, they can offload. But they get great reports from school, they’ve got lovely friends, and I’m really proud of them. They’re nice kids.”

The pride the Ramseys have for their kids really does shine through as they chat.

“With parenting,” Chris says, “there’s absolutely no rulebook. Every single kid’s different, every parent’s different, every scenario is different.

“Let your kids know they’re loved – that would be the only thing I would ever give advice to anyone about, because our kids know they are loved.

“It’s a minefield. It’s the most responsibility you’ll ever have in life – you’re literally moulding a person. It can be really hard, but just let them know they’re loved, don’t be too hard on yourself, and keep them safe. No-one knows what they’re doing. We’re all just muddling through.”

There’s A Poonami In My House by Chris and Rosie Ramsey, illustrated by Paula Bowles, is published by Gallery Kids, priced £12.99. Available now.